Dear Ice Cream Man,
Can I just say that I find your constant cruising of my neighborhood extremely annoying. I know you're a nice guy with a family who is trying to pay the bills by selling high priced sugary ice cream bars and novelties that the kiddies flock to like a druggie looking for crack but can we just talk for a minute about your song list?
- London Bridge is falling down
- Pop goes the weasel
- Entertainer
- Hark the herald angels sing
- Ava Maria
- Jingle Bells!!!!!
ITS MAY!!!!!!!!! Why the hell are you playing Christmas music??? Yes I still hold a grudge from that year that I worked night shift and you would sit in front of my bedroom window playing those songs. I honestly believe that many of my unexplained ice cream cravings came from hearing your music while I slept or attempted to sleep.
The good news is, while you were helping that last batch of kids, I peeked at your wallet. I know where you live and I'll be over at 3am to play some music for you. Do you like AC/DC? They have some catchy little tunes you'll be humming in no time. Hells Bells, Back in Black, Shoot To Thrill, but I really think Highway To Hell is going to be your absolute favorite.
The really good news...you'll hum these songs out of the blue for no reason at all. You'll be sitting in the car and you're wife will ask you "what the hell are you humming about a highway to hell" and you'll say "I have no idea, its just this song thats stuck in my head that WON'T GO AWAY...ever...I hear it in the shower, I hear it when I close my eyes at night, its driving me crazy"
Just know that I'll still be out there, smiling, knowing my work is done and karmic circle of the universe has been completed.
Have a super duper wonderful day! :-)
Love,
Diana
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5 comments:
You made me think about the ice cream man that used to drive through our cul-de-sac all the time when my kids were little. (I never told them the guy sold ice cream) Aren't I terrible! One day my sister was over and he drove by. She said "Oh look kids...here comes the ice cream man!" My daughter said "Oh Aunt Mary, that's just the nice man that rings the bells."
Hey...I didn't want to have to be bargaining with the kids every time he drove by!
They still kid me about that!
Tehehe. When I was younger and heard the ice cream man's music, I'd grab my bike and ride all over town trying to figure out where he was. I swear, he sped up every time he drove near my house, because I'd never be able to catch him! Ah well, I suppose I should thank his speeding from encouraging my ice cream habits...
lol! I actually used to be scared of the ice cream man. I usually found them to be kind of creepy and sleazy! sorry if I just offended someone whose son/husband/etc is one.
The post definately brought a smile to my face, but perhaps you should switch to decaff for a couple of days ;-)
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way..... Oh what fun it is to put the ice-cream man away, hey!
JD
One time the ice cream man cruised through our neighborhood at 10pm. At that point I decided he's up to no good in one way or another.
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